Thursday, February 3, 2011
Going The Distance
Yes, I did steal the title from the romantic comedy with Drew Barrymore and Justin Long. Here is a rough storyline for ya, girl meets boy, boy and girl become inseparable over the summer, girl leaves state for job, boy and girl try to work out this whole long distance thing, let comedy ensue.
So why is this important? Well, this is a very similar situation that FI and I were put into. Although we have known each other since high school we didn't begin dating until I graduated undergrad. I came home for the summer, we clicked, we started dating...with a little help from my cousin's wedding that put us into a love filled, drunk induced state, but hey whatever helps right? Well, I was only home for a mere 3 months when I had to head out to the midwest to start grad school at THE Ohio State University (yes the The is in all caps, mainly because hardcore OSU fans/alum do not like the fact that I omit that word when saying where I went to school) O-H!
So lets factor in a 9 hour commute into a brand spanking new 3 month relationship....if you had asked me back then that I would now be engaged to this man I would tell you you're nuts. Not for the fact that I didn't love him, I did, but after partying hard for 5 years of undergrad and never settling down, to come home to a relationship and a big move, where I would be starting fresh. Didn't think it would happen.
I'm not going to lie, if any of you are contemplating a long distance relationship IT IS HARD! And a lot of work! Communication has to be a major key, every day. Now throw in an unforgiving major, where I was constantly stuffed in a studio, while working full time for the city and attending city meetings, while my boy friend was at home working second shift. Communication existed through rushed text messages and 3 minute long phone calls while driving from work to school or work to studio. I would not wish it on anyone.
The visits were worth it though, especially when we saw each other about once a month. Whenever we could scrape up the cash for him to fly out or vice versa, the weekends were like mini honeymoons. But when we fought, we fought hard. Trust was a major instigator, and throw in exhaustion, and not a lot of face time and you have arguments.
But before I knew it two years had gone by. And I was sitting with thousands of other excited OSU students waiting to graduate on a sweltering June day. Would I ever do it again? Probably not, but i will say that it made us stronger and a better couple because of it. So if anyone out there is wondering if it's worth it it most definitely is, but it is hard work. And sometimes you may feel like giving up. But in the big picture scheme of things I wouldn't trade it for anything!