Wednesday, September 7, 2011

Why I've Been MIA...

Some of you...if anyone stuck with me on here...may have realized that I have been MIA for a while, like 5 months awhile. I guess now is a good enough time as any to catch everyone up. Literally right after I had blogged my last post about 3 months left until the big day the shit hit the fan...and it hit hard! I have been holding off writing this post because one, I honestly didn't think anyone would continue to follow me and two, I was embarrassed and felt like a failure for a long here I go.

We had been having a rough time on the in-law front but after our two vacations I thought that things were getting a little better. The vacations seemed to help and we were dealing with the punches little by little. I realized I had been mistaken when Kevin came home and informed me that he did not want this anymore. And when you ask what is "this?" I can't really tell you, because 5 months later I still don't have an answer. Without going into too much detail here's what happened. I thought everything was good, that we had become a united front. We came back from vacation refreshed and had just had a good night out for a friend's birthday. The next day something didn't seem right with him. When I asked him he refused to talk to me and kept saying nothing was wrong....the next day he came home talking about how him and his parents had made up (without me present or involved, or an apology for me) and now he felt that we should all get along and sweep everything under the rug. This is after a huge betrayal, threats, and ultimatums on their part. I told him that I wasn't happy they cornered him into talking to them without me and that I would listen to what they had to say but things would not be okay for a while. He called me every name in the book, said I was being a drama queen, and loved having drama in my life and was dragging this on. Now for anyone that knows me you can laugh at this statement, as I stay away from drama and don't like to come near it with a ten foot pole. Well the next day is when he informed me that he couldn't do "this." After hours of asking him what "this" was he said the wedding. When I asked him if this stemmed from not wanting to get married in general or to me he couldn't say. I still don't think he even knows as his answers ranged from I don't want to get married in general, to I think we should push back the wedding, to I don't want to get married but I want to stay in a relationship.

Are you confused? Because I sure was from the lack of straight answers. When I asked how long he wanted to push back the wedding for and why after 2 1/2 years was he telling me this now he didn't know. I told him that I wasn't going to waste waiting around for him to decide when he was ready to make a commitment when I had already wasted 2 1/2 years already. Did he want me to wait around another year only to start planning again and then 3 months before tell me he wasn't ready again!? So what had we been doing all this time.

After days of me trying to get him to talk and explain this decision to me, which he dropped this on me then wouldn't come home, or talk to me about his reasons, to him telling me that he didn't need therapy because it's only for crazy people...he came home after work packed his bags and said he was staying at his parents. Told me he was sorry, which was not genuine at all, and walked out. I spent the next week crying non stop, feeling sorry for myself, packing, and over analyzing every detail to try and understand why he was doing this.

Then the clouds parted, I got my butt off the couch and just said to myself, what the hell am I doing? Why am I letting this piece of shit make me feel this way? And that's the day the tears stopped. I made the conscious decision that if someone I thought loved me could just get up and walk away after 2 1/2 years together and 10 years as friends without as much as a reason then this person clearly is not worth my time, tears or energy. I packed up my stuff and got the hell out of our apartment.

You know the George Straight song, She Let Herself Go? That's exactly what I did. Had the time of my life, worked on me, instead of taking care of an over sized child, hung out with friends and just lived. I couldn't believe how happy I was and finally realized how miserable I was with him and that I almost settled with someone that I never would have been happy with my entire life. Him leaving and showing just how immature he is was the best thing to happen to me and I can say that and truly mean it. And you know what...I found a man that makes me so happy I never thought this level of happiness with someone could exist. He treats a woman the way we should be treated.

So don't feel sorry for me...this story has a happy ending! I now realize what I should deserve and I have it! It's a brand new chapter in my life and I can't wait to see what's next. So stick with me! I'll keep you posted on life in Upstate NY and the amazing summer that I had while saying hello to fall and new beginnings!

Friday, April 15, 2011

Double Digits!

When did this wedding planning go full speed? Today is 99 days until the big day...seriously! I was in the right mind set from the get go, in terms of planning and organizing what needed to be done month to month. I even made a million lists, bought a ton of odds and ends for the gagillion DIY projects I had planned (and some I have completed), and just knew what needed to be done.

But like every bride life gets in the way. Between work, traveling, family, baking (possible new business venture?), friends, being on a board, and the major thing....sleep, I have fallen behind. My type A personality does not approve! Now with a mere 99 days left I am in full panic mode, full throttle ahead!

I stayed up until 11:30 last night, tweaking and fixing our wedding invites, so i can hopefully print them today, and then begin the process of cutting, glueing, and compiling those beauties to get in the mail the beginning of May.

Because I love lists, this is what I hope to accomplish in the near future (rest of April):
- Print out invites and compile
- Address invites
- Make card box (same will be used for shower and wedding)
- Finish making thank you cards and envelopes for shower

At first glance the list seems doable...but they are all big projects. We have invited around 70 people to the shower. I know that not everyone will attend, but I would like to have near 70 cards and envelopes just in case, or if we receive other gifts before the wedding. I have almost enough envelopes (which are the easiest to do), but cards I only have about half, and boy are they time consuming.

I already have the boxes I need for the cardbox, but I still need more ribbon, fabric, an accessories to jazz it up. As for addressing the invites that will probably be a weekend project in itself, as well as doing everything for the actual invites.

Now throw in fixer upper projects at my grandparents house, a friend's bridal shower, Easter, and a trip to Buffalo the last weekend in April, as well as everything else going on that life has to offer. I can see migraines in my future.

As the big day gets closer is anyone else making massive lists of things to do? Or are you breaking under the pressure?

Wednesday, April 13, 2011

In Love: Calligraphy

This weekend I am hoping on having all of the wedding invitation pieces printed out, that way we can begin cutting, gluing, and assembling them, in order to get them out the beginning of May. That leaves the envelopes to be dealt with asap! I love the look and feel of calligraphy, it's so whimsical and romantic...what I don't like about it is the price. Seriously, weddings are expensive enough, I don't need to drop bucco bucks on something that 80% of the recipients will throw right in the garbage!

Here are some of my inspiration pics!

So I plan on doing fake calligraphy myself. You may be tilting your head to the side and saying, but how? Well I have two options. Option 1, feed every envelope through the printer individually and print the addresses on, then go over my hand. (The envelopes are a metallic silver, so I'm thinking a light grey ink)

Or option 2, print the addresses on sheets of paper, place the paper in the envelope and then use a light box to trace the address. I actually don't know how plausible option 2 is because the envelopes might be too thick. 

So these are my only two options I have come up with. Now I have a million questions for you. Does anyone know what is the better choice? Which one is easier? And does anyone else have any other options? Also, does anyone want to come to Upstate NY and help me address 100 envelopes? There will be wine involved I promise!

Shipping Up To Boston

I am trying to catch up on everything that has happened in the past month, where I have been a bad blogger and getting very far behind!

I told you that I am a planner....yes I love party planning, and wedding planning, but I have a degree in city planning. Through my association, American Planning Association, they have an annual conference. This year it happened to be in Boston. Now, although we live less than 3 hours away, I somehow have not been out to Beantown in 10 years. So from this past Saturday to Tuesday I was getting reacquainted with the wonderful city. I had conferences from early in the morning until 3-4 everyday. After which, Kevin and I would head out for some heavy sight seeing and to gorge ourselves on some of the great Boston eateries.

First it was off to the New England Aquarium!

We got to see the seals outside

My favorite animal ever....penguins!!! And boy were there a lot of them!

Little blue penguins

Nemo fish

And Dori

The "Predator" penguin

Lots of fish


Sea Dragon

Myrtle the Turtle...she is 80 years old and ginormous!

The middle of the aquarium is this cylindrical tube that goes up the entire height of the building. Smaller fish are on the bottom, the higher you go up the bigger the fish get, this is also where the turtles, sting rays, morray eel, and sharks like to hang out.

Cute sea horses and mussels

Giant octopus asleep and stuffed up in the corner

More penguins!!!

And of course a shark

Afterwards we walked around the docks. It was such a nice day we couldn't pass it up.

Instead of taking the T back to our hotel we ended up walking the 20+ blocks back to get some more sight seeing in.

We stopped at Quincy Market

Mr. Sam Adams

The Freedom Trail

King's Chapel Graveyard of 1630

Granary Graveyard

Paul Revere, Sam Adams, John Hancock, and Benjamin Franklin's parents are buried here 
(just to name a few)

We walked through the Boston Common and the Boston Public Garden

We finished by walking up Commonwealth and heading back to our hotel. The next day, when I was done with my conference in the afternoon, we jumped back on the T and headed up to Harvard. 

I don't go to school here.

We jumped back on the T and headed to the Old North Church

Then we stopped and had dinner at the famous Union Oyster House. We feasted on half shell oysters, calamari, scallops, and broiled scrod...amazing!

Had to throw in a planning quote. "We can erect thousands of buildings, and put down miles of concrete, but until the next generation can say that Boston is a better place to live, we will have achieved nothing."
We then walked back through Quincy Market and headed on home to our fluffy hotel bed. The next morning it was time to pack up and say goodbye to Boston. But there was one more place we needed to stop first...the Sam Adams Brewery!!!

Mmmmm...barley and hops!

The barrel room!

We even saw the two guys from the commercials! Don't believe it's them? Have a look below!


We even got to sample Boston's Brick is only sold in Boston, and you can only get it on tap from some exclusive bars or in keg form. And if I could have fit a keg in my car I would have. 

Overall we had a great time in Boston and will hopefully be heading back soon!

Tysons Corner Subway Project

Now, I know that I have been emerged in wedding talk, blogs, pictures, the works...and that is mainly reflected through my blog. But, I want to bring a little of it back to my other passion, city planning. Now I know that some of you (if not all) are now asleep at your desks from those two words, but while visiting DC I was able to see this very intense rehab project up close.

I visited DC last May and noticed all the construction...everywhere...but didn't pay much mind to it, it is a big city after all and cities tend to have construction projects going on all the time. Well we returned, and it was still happening, that's when I was curious. Turns out that right outside of DC, in the suburbs, and mainly focusing on Tysons Corner, they are extending the DC subway system to Dulles Airport.

You're probably saying to yourself, "why is this so amazing?" Glad you asked, this is the largest scale attempt in the country to remake a traffic choked suburban area while three huge truss cranes that assemble bridge spans in the air while motorists travel below. This allows the work to proceed while 100,000 shoppers and commuters go about their business. Now this may be my crazy planner brain coming forward but this is amazing. The project started in January 2009 and will not be completed until sometime in 2016.

You can see more about the project here, with pictures and an interactive map. 

Has anyone been by this project?

Cherry Blossoms Make Everything Better!

Seriously everyone, DC was just what the doctor ordered! After an emotional couple of weeks we were drained in every way a human being could be. But as soon as we stepped on that plane Thursday night everything seemed to just roll right off.

Long time friends Dan and Joanna spoiled us. Every other word out of their mouths was "You are on vacation, we are going to have fun!" And fun we had!

Friday while they were both at work for a while we relaxed...I actually forgot what that word meant. Lounging, reading, and playing the Wii is the best kind of therapy. When they returned home they made us an awesome meal and then treated us to a harbor boat cruise ride.

We got to see the cherry blossoms for the first time!

Saw some of the monuments.

Convinced myself that this helicopter was Marine 1 with Mr. Obama on it.

And of course goofed around like we know best!

On our way home we stopped by the White House.....I wanted to go up and ask for Michelle.

Saturday the girls went and got pampered. A 2 1/2 hour mani/pedi spa treatment.....three words.....oh my god! Massaging chair, scrubs, lotions, the works....heaven! While we were contemplating doing this everyday, the boys went out to the shooting range. When we returned home it was out to DC for a while.

We saw the cherry blossoms in their glory!

Jefferson from a far

Washington Monument

Representing NY

Vietnam Memorial

And of course, Mr. Lincoln himself!

Then it was time to head out to favorite Brazilian Steakhouse. We all left with a meat baby in every could have rolled me out!

Sunday we were leaving in the morning, so they brought us around Old Town for an scrumptious lunch at the Warehouse.

We loved every second of it and have these two people to thank for an awesome time!!!